In N’ Out of Grace

We wanna be free!
We wanna be free to do what we wanna do!
We wanna be free to ride!
And we wanna be free to ride on machines without being hassled by the man!

And we wanna get loaded!

I am listening to Superfuzz Bigmuff, cracking back Coronas and failing to code anything productive. The magikal TiVo is recording both the premier of Heroes and this week’s episode of The Sarah Connor Chronicles at the same time. In HD! Technological madness, this is.

Back in, oh, 1995 or so, there were only, like, four movie channels. So you gots what they gave, which was usually the same five movies. God help you if you wanted to watch the tube during the daytime.

Over time, the number of channels increased pretty heavily. At the beginning of the year, I think I was getting something like thirty or thirty-five movie channels plus all the other crap. So there was always something on – which is important when you work from home.

However, now that I have all this high-def goodness, I’m finding myself in the same position I was a decade ago. High-def teevee looks so much freakin’ better that I can’t go back to standard definition. And while I still get the four-quadrillion standard definition channels, I don’t want to watch any of them – I only want to watch the shit that’s on the ten or twelve high-def channels.

Which sucks during the day, because there are only three or four movie channels, and they all play kids movies before four p.m. And my other options are Dr. Phil, Oprah, and the Guiding Light.

Life is hard.

Jesus take me to a higher place
Sliding in ‘n’ out of grace
Christ – body and blood I crave
Sliding in ‘n’ out of grace, yeah

Mom is home from the hospital now following her double bypass heart surgery. This is apparently a very, very good thing that she’s recovering so quickly. My father and I were actually able to talk about things other than her today (such as the US victory in the Ryder Cup and my boys trouncing the fuck out of the Lions [31 to 13; eat it bitches]).

Speaking of football, my alma mater is playing WVU on Saturday as some sort of “state rivalry” thing. I’m fairly certain I’m not going to be able to see this game through the miracle of Comcast but maybe it will show up on DISH or summat and I’ll be able to see it.

(Hey. Two prime numbers. Awesome.)

Speaking of home, I am (very) likely to be heading there for Christmas. EA “shuts down” during this time, so there’s no work, and I haven’t been home in a dog’s age. Also: mom being sick. Also: need to see the mountains. Also: hopefully run into old school people from home.

Speaking of people from home, here is Jenny in a commercial for the Sarah Palin Action Figure. (Yes, KBK, I know you’re sick of hearing about Palin, but it’s Jenny!)

Cry for mercy, relieve my hate
Sliding in ‘n’ out of grace
Spill my seed, suck my waste
Sliding in ‘n’ out of grace

I took a nap (well, I tried to take a nap but failed) and upon getting up found myself suddenly depressed. No real reason, just . . . down. I reckon it is the result of the previous week’s crappiness catching up to me.

(Also, I got kind of shot down by this chick for a dinner date. I include that only for completion, even though it’s probably not impacted my mental state. She and I have been orbiting each other for several months at various distances. She’d asked me out a week or so ago but had to bail, and when I tried to reschedule she said she was taking some “self time”. C’est la vie; this is pretty par for the course for the two of us. One of us is always unavailable. Hence my thought that it has nothing of impact.)

Facebook is weird. I posted in my “status” that I was “suddenly depressed” and then got responses from three kids I went to high school with about it. It has been weird, but I’ve been connecting with people from my Deep Past more and more often and with greater and greater depth.

Now I’m listening to Mudhoney and it’s all better. This was the shit I was listening to as I grew “into my own,” so it’s always a good nostalgia trip.

Oh God, how I love to hate
Sliding in ‘n’ out of grace
Save me Lord, and fuck the race
Sliding in ‘n’ out of grace

We’re all douchebags on this bus.